When it rains it pours, my anxiety level is back up and I had to use some anti anxiety medication today. Another sleepless night, early morning waking. I am trying to hold it together but bad shit keeps happening to us. Some forces are just evil!

I'm tired of being forced into dealing with situations I don't bring on and then getting treated like crap for defending myself.  

On top of all that stuff, our riding lawn tractor engine blew up while I was cutting the lawn. It made this huge pop noise like a gunshot and then smoke and fire came out the top. David took it apart and discovered a crack along the engine.

We need a new engine to the tune of $600. I'm proud of myself though because normally I would have cried and freaked out. I actually sat on the tractor watching the flames and smoke while my husband was wondering why I was still sitting on it. Shock maybe? I don't really know. I was in disbelief of what had just happened.

On a better note,  I got to spend the day with Kelli, Luke, Traci,Dan, Chris, Kevin and I even got to talk to Adam. I am a happy mom. We talked a little about wedding plans. OOH I am so excited for the kids! This is a wonderful time of their lives and I hope we can all take joy in helping them make their day all that more special. 

My little gully bean was not feeling so good today, she fell asleep on the couch before they left to go back home. I hope she is feeling better after a good nights sleep. I don't feel like I spent enough time with her this visit. But I am very glad she has her sister and Dan close by her. 

David has a very early run in the morning and he is sleeping already. He was cold so I had to dig out extra blankets. We turned the heat on in the main part of the house, but we cant really afford to turn the heat on in the master bedroom just yet because it eats too much into our electric bill. 

BIG HUGGS for my cousin Scott who let me borrow his rider tonight so I could finish the lawn. I appreciate him so much. 

On that note, I have some photo's to process and then I too will go to bed. Good night cyber world...