I have an hour or so before Maggie gets home. Fridays are most peoples long awaited happy day, for me, it is a long boring day. I got the laundry done, cleaned the house, the cat boxes. I decided to wait on the floors anticipating the Schwans man was going to walk across them to put the food on the table. He kindly declined when I gave him the go ahead. He said he has cleats on his shoes and did not want to scratch the wood floors. 

I had an "I miss Mooch moment" today and cried a little.  I still find it hard to believe he is gone. Eighteen years is a long time!

I just wanted to say that despite my previous blog attitude, I am only out to be supportive to my husband and not rip on the kids dad.  I am not out to make him miserable or disrespect him publicly. But I also won't lie about how things are from our point of view. What happened did happen and we are just trying to get past it as best we can.

I have to write how I feel and how I see things or anxiety will creep back into my world. Always being shut down as a child made me need an adult outlet, writing is my outlet. I really enjoy doing it. So just to be clear, I am not slamming anyone on purpose or otherwise. I am just taking care of myself.

The wind is so cold on my lungs, I keep having to take the dog outside and I come in wheezing. I don't know how to deal with this because there is no one else that can take the dog out when David is on the road. This dog seems to have to piss every half hour. Early mornings and late evenings are the worst and the coldest. 

My friend Dar is making me a pair of gloves because I have yet to find any to keep my fingers warm. I have super sensitive fingers in the cold. They sting real bad when I go out to do anything at all. It is so kind and thoughtful of her to send me a pair she made.

Asthma is pissy tonight. I used my nebulizer twice today and the last time I used two vials instead of one. I wish I could afford the steriod that goes with my albuteral, but we are not quite there yet. One box cost $300 if you can believe that crap! 

Maggie should be home soon and then we are going to go shopping for some of our Thanksgiving stuff. I cleaned out the refrigerator, freezer and cupboards to make room. 

Well time for me to fly.......... ;)  great song too!  Chow for now..